thats good advice....in the past i left my friends behind and white knuckled quit on a dime.....(shrugs)....i just am feeling an old demon...plus some of my family i am around now has some of my old habits.....i thank you for the advice......i have attempted to start writing prayers and doing sketches...even though i am no artist......it helps........i dont have a lot of friends or a support group......but....i think, ill come out alright........