There were signs, you bet.

What there wasn't, however, was fair notice that she was heading out the door until after she had long left. She left at least a week or two before she told me, maybe even as long as a month or two!

The signs were that when we were in the middle of an argument, she would say it's over, she's done. Then the next morning, we'd call each other, make up, and continue on as tho nothing happened. I thought it was just one of those things some couples do -- get into a heated argument, say things they don't mean just to hurt the other person, and then regret it later.

She says she was seriously trying to break up with me during those times, but it doesn't seem like it. She never stuck with it if that's the way she felt.

Now, out of the blue, she breaks up with me and says she's seeing someone else. But to make matters worse, she doesn't just break up with me. She says she needs some time to think about what to do. She doesn't want to talk about it (until Thursday night, finally, see my other post), and when we do talk, it appears the relationship has a fair amount going for it, things aren't as bad as they seemed, and maybe we've got a chance.

Then it seems like we don't, because she continues seeing this other guy and makes it sound as if our problems (again!) are just too difficult to deal with.

What it is is simple. Our relationship wasn't perfect, we might get into an argument once a month or every other month. I didn't meet all of her needs. I was working on that in myself, and she acknowledged I had made changes. So she's dissatisfied, and someone calls her out of the blue and she feels like, what the heck, she deserves it and finds the guy meets some of those needs I don't.

So maybe she deserves this guy, ya know? Fine, just don't leave your current relationship as though it meant nothing to you overnight, that's all I ask.

John