Giving up is always an option. When weighing the benefit against the cost giving up seems to be the best course of action. So I live my life feeling like crap.. could be worse.

Medicating me doesn't change who I am or my perspective. Hospitalizing myself won't help.. if anything it would escalate things to an unfortunate outcome.

In the end no one is going to help me get a house, a job, help pay bills, check on me, blah blah blah.. pointless. I don't function and I don't really care to. Yet for all the help people aren't willing to give me no one is going to accept the fact that im not impressed with life. Seriously its just not for me.. so whats the big deal?

There is no solution to this other than to let it run its course. Which I have no problems doing. At least for now I have some freedom.