I could have written your post myself. So close are my problems with this to yours. I suspect your reaction really is depression mixed with a feeling of resentment for having to study something you have no real interest in. People say just go to class and everything would be okay. All they do is make you feel more guilty and you resist even more. Wish I could give you advice on this, but I am literally stuck in the same position. Do not give up trying we will make it.