Thank you both for taking the time to respond.....I said a lot above and again will say that the whole story would fill a book. isn't that true of everyone?
We have talked and seemed to come to an understanding. She tried to explain her reasons and why she chose a bar......she said she would go back to the bar......Im not sure if that mena the particular one or any bar......i didnt want to ask and sound like a jerk.
Since she had told me the week prior that she just couldn't go to a bar and have the booze affecting her.....yet went there a few days after she proclaimed that......well I feel it is hard to take her word.
I have always put a lot of stock in a persons word.......I was in the Navy and have done work for the DOD.......a persons word is the ultimate. Without it there is little to go on.
The whole bar drinking events are just so stressful......partly because I guess I was raised so differently and also because I am a man. I'm getting tired of sitting all by myself at work and at home too, but I dont thikmI will find the answers I need in a bar.
I have made a choice to seek out my local priest and get back inot my faith. For me I think is the best to handle this situation.
I do love her dearly and I know she loves me.......I just get the feleing that this new diversion of hers to ward off being lonely while I am not there can go horribly wrong is all. It isn't that I dont trust her....I dont trust the booze, the climate in a bar room. I honeslty have told her that i dont see why she can't go to a place like TGIF (Fridays) Red Lobster etc. All those places have bars that foks can sit at and socialize...but they aren't filled with drunks etc. I guess it is all how you look at it.
In any case I just have this nagging feeling that this is or was an ultimatium of sorts on her part. It has sort of worked but I think it is looking more and more that it has backfired for her and me too.

I just would never ever have done that. If I wanted to go out to a bar to have girls buy me drinks and socialize with them then I would have told her and said that was it........
Is this just me being jelaous? Is my male pride clouding my perspective here?
Or do I have this right and the bluff she played was dangerous? and now the end is here?

I relaly do not know what to do? I have expressed myself carefully i feel with out sounding controling. I have told her she certainly can go where she wants...that is always met with..."I know I can do what I want!".....just doesnt seem like the answer or response that is nice. Sounds kind of sarcastic and rude to be honest.
My heart says work it out.....keep talking figure out a compromise.......the pilot in me says to eject!

Help?