Oh just trying not dissociate, and being really depressed and pissed off about how I have been dissociating since I woke up this mornning and I went for a long while and didn't and now BAM! and realizing that I have no "normal anymore. I meann, either little manda is out or I am floting on clod 100. No in between. No normal.

(sorry rant over... shutting up now)