Hi Merlin

Because my abuse was by family members, my trust ability has always been out of whack. But as I got older, I learned. "Trust but verify" would be my motto. And I always trust my gut instinct. While I have been wrong a few times, doing that has mostly saved me from bad situations and people.

Trusting someone on a very intimate level is very difficult for me. There's only one person in my life I trust like that, my husband. For me I think part of the difficulty of trusting is the loss of control feeling I get. Real intimacy is scary, people might disappoint you, they might not be there for you when you need them, they might not truly understand, they might even judge you. So keeping my own counsel feels much safer than trusting another person. But yes, it does get lonely sometimes, that's why I came here to PC.