Thread: Telling Family
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Old Apr 23, 2009, 07:58 PM
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Elysium Elysium is offline
Where the HELL are we?
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: So Cal
Posts: 3,342
Hi....

I'm sorry you had to experience this.

I went through a similar situation and I have a couple suggestions for you.

First, If there is one person in your family that you are most connected with and have good, open communication with, you might want to speak with this family member first. Share your experience and let them know that you are concerned about the consequences that your speaking up could have on your cousin and yourself. Maybe they would be able to help you bring it up with the rest of your family.

Second, is there a family member that you can take with you to a therapy appt where you can discuss this with your therapist present. The extra support for yourself could be very good.

A couple other things I'd like to point out. Sometimes, when people confront their abusers directly, this can be detrimental to the abusee. I don't know your cousin, so I don't really know what his values are and where he stands on morality at this point in his life, but there is the chance that you could confront him and he could deny it and attempt to convince you that it never happened. He could also try and prevent you from telling others if he feels it would tarnish his image.

Sometimes other family members can have this reaction too. They can say that you just misunderstood the contact, that it never happened and couldn't have happened, and that it is lies. Not saying this to convince you one way or another to tell or not tell, but just be prepared that it could really go either way.

Whatever you do, I think incorporating your T into this would be best.

Good luck!!
__________________
Thanks for this!
chaotic13