((((((((((((((Me So)))))))))))))))))

You are doing such good work!!, whether you realize it or not.........
that last conclusion you reached, about beng forced to do stuff and needing to protect each other, well that is the nature of DID.......the disassociating starts because another alter comes out to protect you during stuff that you could\can not handle....
You ( all of you, no mattter how many there are ) definitely are NOT a freak....you are a wonderful, caring and thoughtful human being who deserves love just aas much as anyone else!...........All that has happened is NOT your fault it was you family because they did not give you the love and comfort that you deserved so much...as all of us do and so many of us ( including beads ) did and never received........
Learning about your 'others' is kinda lke a journey........be patient with yourselfs as you walk on your path....this 'journey' of healing..........
healing for beads has started with many, many tiny baby steps and yes, we often are impatient with ourselfs too wanting to 'get well' and it cant hapen 'fast enuf'...........but it will happen only as fast as we can handle and our goodest effort is good enuf.........as is yours!!!!
hoping that we did not ramble on too much.......just trying to give you some insight from our own experiences......
love and hugs,
beads
( always here for you, anytime )