Oh dear, I am so sorry you are feeling so down today. At times I have felt the same way. Do not give up hope Valexand, I believe everyone wants to feel love, some day when you least expect it you will meet a wonderful man. While you have made great efforts to improve yourself physically perhaps you should work from the inside out also. Adopt a positive attitude, open yourself to a relationship. Go buy a book called the circle and read it, it is about bringing things into your life by envisioning. I dont know that it will help or not but it can not hurt. As to that man that left you over your age, he was not worth your time or effort, he was an *****, not worthy of your consideration, any relationship with him would have been all about him and never emotionally satisfying or rewarding for you. 32 is not old, you have a full life ahead of you, grasp it and live every moment of it to the fullest. Concentrate on the good things you have in life, not what you are lacking, it will help with your mood and perspective. Things will get better for you, I am sure of it. Please find some peace in your heart and open yourself to better experiences. I hope you soon find what it is you need and desire in life, I am confident you can and will. Hang in there, things will improve!