Till now I would say that you let your emotions and feelings 'flow out'. Which had effected all those around you with 'touch' and 'emotion', whether positive or negative....Outward bound, away from your energy....This effected the relationships that you seeked and tried to nurture........
Now, try to let your feelings 'flow in'. Accept the energy....Hold fast, need to know, only accept what you know is proven......Harsh?... Yes...but what have you been dealt???? in the past..Time to think back and reassess on the life you think cannot be salvaged......You are wrong.......You've only just started!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!