I woke up SO nervous this morning. I have T today, and we have 90 minute appointments on Mondays, so they tend to be pretty intense.

I am completely dissociated...when I think "what are we talking about in T these days? what do I need to talk about?" my mind is pretty much blank. I know the general topic, but I won't let myself think any farther than that.

I know I have a wonderful T, and that he will there for me during the appointment and to help me deal with the aftermath, whatever that ends up being. But....blah! Always moving forward, moving through, is so tiring and stressful. I kind of just want to rest.

I know that the stress is getting to me on some level because I can feel my ED pushing at me. Which probably means that self-destructive teen me is trying to make herself known, and that is always a huge mess.

I guess I am just typing to get some clarity. My head hurts.