Hi Deliquesce,

I have the same fears. only I've been keeping up not bieng ready for almost 12 years now. Last Friday in my dance class a very nice man approached me after class and we had a great conversation and he said hope to see you next week, He had been comming in with another woman .
Just the thought of what if he asked me out what would I do which may not happen ( he coud just be a very nice man and the woman he came in with coud be his wife for all i know .) regardless , even his friendliness triggered me into OH NO. tells me just how litte I"ve done to get ready .

Part of it is hangng out too much on the internet and not getting my life to where it needs to be.

what I do when asked and am ambivelant ( another word for scared S***less ) is I say .to them . I'd like to go for coffee with you but at this time Im not ready , Call me in six months and ask me again .

They don't call in six months . ....

You can also say. I'm open to just having a freindship where we have coffee and chat .

that sets the perameters for what you want and will give you plenty of time to find out if "dating" this person is feels comfortable (Dating meaning more emotional and physical intimacy. )

Try not to obsess too much about it....

This all sounds good in theory huh.. . .LOL!!!

I' trying to let myself just go out for coffee. That in itself woud be a small mirical.

Patricia