I'm in the same boat as you. He was my first and only relationship. Not a good relationship though. He took advantage of my kindness and innocence. 5 years have passed and I'm still not sure if I'm over him. I'm sure that with a new relationship I"ll be able to forget but here's my bad luck: nobody is showing up, nobody is interested in me.

RUN. Right now get up, leave the computer, put on your running shoes and run. This is what I do. When he creeps into my mind I put my shoes on and I either go running, shopping, out with friends, to a movie. Just go out. Feed your mind with other things. Fill it up so that there is no more space for his image to sneak in.

Recently I read that people who tend to dwell on past relationships (both good and bad) are those that feel lonely because through the memory they try to find some form of company, or the feeling of warmth. This is probably correct as an observation. However, I haven't been able to find a cure for it yet. Still working on it. Truth is, no matter how much I've packed my schedule, his face pops up in my head, especially before going to sleep....or first thing when I wake up. It sucks.

Good luck to all those crushed hearts out there.