((((((((((((((((((((((((xtree))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I have had that thought on and off during therapy - usually as a way to push T away. But I have learned that he really does genuinely care about me. It scares me and feels good at the same time.

I used to work in the mental health field, and I DEFINITELY cared very much about my clients. Some were very special to me, and I still think about them and wonder about them 12 or 13 or 14 years later. Early in T when I wondered if it was possible for T to really care about me, I thought about that experience, and I realized that of course he can care.

I hope you feel better xtree.