This is great! Your H clearly sees you relationship as just another type of service. I hope you will continue to not let him devalue you in this way.

I admittedly engage in things that ... well, should be a shared experience but really aren't. When I do this I feel like total crap afterwards, even though I know deep down inside my H values and respects me. Although I can rationalize and justify what I do, in the end it still affects me in a negative way.

From what you wrote, it really doesn't seem like your H is mentally well and he doesn't seem to respect you at all. This would be devastating to me. ((((many hugs))) to you mixed-up. This week I would look at your lawn and say... that work was tiring but I can do it! I would maybe see if a neighbor or some salesman at the local hardware store could give you instructions on how to service and maintain your mower. I think sending a clear message to your H that you no longer require his services. Maybe he will then seek someone else for bjs.