oh sweety!!!
You are taking a very very very heavy load! Is there any way you can lighten that load a bit? I know your initial reaction of being a failure all too well. I'm glad, though, that you got comfort from your friend and from your dad. You are so not a failure. You are an inspiration. You struggle and try and don't give up. I'm sorry your mom is being the way she is. You should be very proud of yourself for being willing to accept help, to learn new study skills and give it another shot. I know I'm very proud of you!