Each person gets to decide how others can treat them.
So, what one considers acceptable, another one does not.
Abuse is abuse. Hurtful and mean is hurtful and mean.
Taking it personally...I wonder, how could you not?

A diagnosis is simply a word. A word used to describe a bundle of symptoms. It isn't a shield to hide behind when behavior is unacceptable. Blaming the diagnosis is not taking personal responsiblity.

You can't fix this. You can't 'forgive' this "X" number of times and then it will go away. He needs to be working with a therapist and only he can fix it.