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susan888 · May 06, 2009, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kaika

I've also bullied other children too... it wasn't really to impress anyone, but what I learned from other kids was that if you were younger and smaller then someone to be submissive or else you'd be punished. So of course, when I saw kids I thought where weaker then me trying to act as equals, I wanted to put them in their place. It didn't last very long at all. Mostly because the first time I actually seriously gave this girl a couple of years younger then me lip she beat the ever loving crap out of me.

(I guess I'm just a lover, not a fighter) when I was older and in school nobody would take me seriously no matter how bigger or how much older I was anyways because I was the default punching bag for everyone anyways. Other then that's I'd annoy my brother's friends...but that's pretty much normal, and another time I was being manipulative but hey I was a very young kid so it's not like I even understood what I was doing except I knew that if I walked through this kid's block tower then he'd stomp on my feet then I'd make some crocodile tears, say it was an accident and then he'd be taken away and everyone would be happy again. I'd also chase people around laughing but hell, that was their own fault for treating me like vermin and threatening to hit me if I ever made contact with them. Because it always came back to bite me I don't think any of the kids ever felt wronged because well...in the end they got their justice

for a little bit I felt guilty that I could be bullied, know how hurtful it is, then turn around and do the exact same thing to someone else... but I've learned to forgive myself.

You never know what some other kid is going through. My dad killed himself when I was in the 3rd grade and my brother died of leukemia 2 yrs later. When I went back to school in the 4th grade I had gained a lot of weight and I can't tell you how harrassed I was until the 10th grade. That does so much more damage to someone already dealing with home issues. My advise would be to apologize. I would absolutely welcome that from my childhood bullies!