"I don't even know how. . ." it's a learning process. Just as you didn't go from first grade straight to senior in high school, you don't learn new emotional things instantly either! It's all learning but on a different plane than head learning. You are saying your mother didn't know how either, didn't know how to tell you she cared for you, so how could she teach you and where else would you have learned? That's what you can learn working with your T but it will take time.