Hi Eternal,

Envy goes deep in depression. My feeling is that the bottom line is envy of all those people who are not ill. Simple as that.

It's all part of the negative thinking of course. From experience, my advice is 'go easy'. There is no need to be competitive with others, and especially not when your in depression. That will just kick you down again at the first sign of failure.

In my last long downturn I took up a quiet activity (collecting books) and the most stressful thing I did was dusting my bookshelves. Sometimes that is all we can handle.

My message to you at the moment is 'It's not your fault'. The illness puts us in these loops and we need to recognise that. You deserve credit for sharing here, among people who know the score. Well done, Eternal.

Good thoughts to you, Myzen

PS - I sometimes think that a depressed person competing with a healthy person would be like someone with no shoes trying to run a marathon!