think aloud here anytime.

((nightdream)) you are NOT stupid! You are learning and trying and searching. You aren't just sitting there saying "yes, I think life is hunky dory and I'll do nothing".............you've made changes and continue to seek ways of creating a better--safer--life for yourself.

I'm glad you sought out more reading about what abuse can do to a person. Nothing you learn says you're stupid. If anything your seeking info shows your strength and intelligence. It shows you are trying.

I continue to hold hope for you sweetie.