when i was little i played sexually with alot of kids age 5 to 8 or so. i participated in everything from touching and being touched to simulating oral sex to letting a girl stick toilet paper up my rectum. i drew privates on my dolls and drank and ate feces and urine at age nine. A little older than that(3 or 4 years) i ate blood from my menstration and my discharge.i started having bad thoughts about harming at age 9 or 10.(younger kids) everything i saw and thought i turned into something sexual, i sexualized female teachers and i am a female and still cant decide what sex i prefer. is this a gay issue( do gay people sexualize at a early age could these issues just be because i am gay, are these things normal for a child, does anyone know of a book that may help me.

thanks muffi