Hi Lion,

Looks like your trying to find a win win if possible.

When I need to address innaproprite behavior in another I first need to look at my own .

If My husband or boyfriend shared our intimate gyrations to other men at a card game I'd feel fairly exposed and I'd feel violated. Most don't want a threesome.

This does not excuse what he did. I would be out of my mind if I were your wife . If its unwanted its unwanted . But it maybe complicated. She may like him on some level.

Your wife is sending messages like this.

"new stamp in the shape of a vagina. But, it's not selling because only 3% of men know how to lick the damn thing"

Here's his text back

"ha ha ha very funny. I'd show you here & now how to lick a ***** if my wife & your husband won't get upset. You big tease"



Right , we are free to send graphic jokes if thats our style.

we are free to walk around half exposed . Personally its not my style .





You might want to try meditaion if you want to save the relationship . It would be uncomfortable broaching these subjects especially the incest ?

Mediators try to not take sides just have both sides aired so both are accurately heard .In the end both parties agree to make changes.

One for you and your wife might be to change your ways of being so free with sexual comments in mixed company in your circle of friends.

This way it doesn't point the finger in your friends eye why you continue on the same as always. with others.

Patricia