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I have been with my boyfriend for three years now. Lately, I have this weird feeling when thinking about speaking to another male. I wasn't like this untill recently...Although I have always been a little shy around guys, its never gotten to the point of not talking to them at all. I don't mind talking to guys on forums or through emails, but when it comes to speaking face-to-face, or on the phone I feel akward. When I was younger (12 or 13 years old), I was touched very inapproprietly by a man...It was a very traumatic time in my life, and it haunts me even to this day. I used to have friends that were guys up untill recently-I just stopped talking to them as much as I used to. I feel like I am betraying my boyfriend even though Im just speaking. It feels as though there is a voice in my head saying things such as "Since your talking to him, you must like him.", "Your a dirty, little w****." "Your disgusting." The list can go on and on...I know that the voices are not true, but sometimes they really get to me...Can someone please give me a helping hand of advice on how to ignore these unwanted thoughts? Personal stories are welcome!
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Dash out, dash out
From your far too sad destiny
You’re not the flower of hell
At such a place
Don’t bloom, don’t bloom
You mustn’t get caught
The pieces of time flutter about ...
-When The Higurashi Cry
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