Quote:
Originally Posted by muffi
... why do people do the things i have done and have bad thoughts and impulses...
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Or else:
When they find themselves having thoughts and impulses (as we all do, all the time) how do they go about deciding that certain ones must be "bad"?
Quote:
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... i am way to analytical for someone just to say this is why and me believe it.
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I don't blame you in the slightest. I wouldn't want to have to believe something on someone's say-so either. If they were obviously speaking from their own personal experience, I might accept that it was so
for them and maybe also look at whether anything like it ever seemed to be so for me.
I'm a long, long way from remembering everything that's ever happened to me (and, of course, distinguishing what I do remember from what I might have made up or forgotten).
This, all by itself, may sound a bit out of context, but here goes: I prefer to "go on about my business" as much as possible and notice how I operate
right now. Then, if I do find myself, for instance, unaccountably avoiding some kind of situations (talking on the phone to people I don't know?) or seeking out others (chocolate chip cookies?)
and that seems to get in the way of whatever I'm doing
and I happen to have time...
... I'll occasionally pick up that thread, and follow it for a while, and see what else it happens to lead me to...
... until I either make some interesting connections (to be followed up eventually) or let it drop till the next time I think of it.
As far as I can tell, I was never sexually abused. Anything sexual seemed to be such a big non-no, though, that that alone had my curiosity about it way up.