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Elysium · May 13, 2009, 06:33 PM

(((((Orange Blossom)))))

I am sorry for your pain. I do hear you and I can understand. I have experienced and am still experiencing similar issues. Even now I don't feel as if I can show my emotions to my family members because I don't think they would understand. They are secret keepers. They burry things and claim that they have "moved on" and that I should do that too. They look at me like a pariah for bringing up all the old and painful issues and they do a good job at making me feel horrible for trying to heal.

I don't know if they do it intentionally. But I think some do. So I keep to myself and I hide from my family so they won't have to deal with my pain. So they can keep living in their buried realities. I don't want to hurt them, and me asking for answers and seeking accountability does that. And I end up feeling ashamed. I don't want to hurt my family.

I am not trying to give you the "Oh, I know just how you feel" line. I just want you to know that I understand, from my perspectives and that you are not alone.

I hope no one here is making you feel as if you do need to walk on eggshells here, because I don't want you to have to do that. This is a place for you to get support and be able to express your emotions and feelings as they are. Not how other people would like them to be.

Please take good care of yourself. I am here if you need to talk!!