|
the process of getting to my session is more stress than i feel is worth it. the drive there puts a horrible feeling in my stomach....walking into the office i pray noone is around so i dont get spotted....the waiting room is the worst....choosing which seat to sit in....having to acknowlege the secretaries....having to give that d*mn $15 dollars...."do u want a receipt sarah?"....uh uh....."sure" ::runs back to seat and buries head in magazine...."here ya go" ::grabs reciept with head down.. "thanks" ::runs back to seat...:: now we play the waiting game...flippin through the magazine, reading nothing because im so worried about when my T opens that door....the waiting game is the worst....i used to get there 10 minutes early...but the wait made me too anxious...so id drive there 10 minutes early and wait in my car for 5....and wait in the waiting room for 5....T opens the door...stands in the doorway "hi sarah, com'on back"....stands in the doorway while i walk by ' look at her? dont look at her? smile? dont smile? head up? head down? walk fast? walk slow?' iinto the office i go...set my purse on the floor..cringe and wait for her to get ready....i think its the worst 20 minutes of my life all together....the stress makes it not even worth going.....idk what to do..i like talkin to her...i hate the presession nerves though
__________________
당신의 사랑은 법률을 위반하고 있었다, 그러나 나는 증인을 필요로 했다 <3
|