I talked to my husband this afternoon and let him know that I was going to be making an appointment to see someone asap because I'm tired of living this way. I was surprised when he agreed that he thinks I could be suffering from depression. I have always had pretty low self-esteem but since I have had my kids almost 4yrs ago it's gotten worse and I think that is because of how much stress I'm under now. I love my kids more than anything but raising 3 three and half year olds is pretty stressful and crazy at times. I am so moody ALL THE TIME, one week I'm up cleaning like crazy getting everything done with no help to the next week doing NOTHING literally not even giving myself or the kids a bath or going outside in the yard. It's all I can do all this week just to get them fed and stuck in front of tv. That sounds horrible but all I wanna do is sleep. I just haven't had the energy to do any of it. Thinking of getting up and cleaning makes me tired. My kids are suffering and I've been sitting around all day crying. All they want is me to play with them and today my little grl(my triplets are 2boys 1girl) came up to me and put her hand on my cheek and said "Mommy are you happy?" My answer......"no" she then kissed my cheek and asked me if I was happy now...how do I answer "no I'm not" and why didn't it make me happy???? I want to be WAY MORE involved but I'm gonna have to admit that something is up and this isn't normal. Now I just have to have enough guts to call someone tomorrow! They deserve it ........and maybe that will help me feel like I'm being a good enough mom. I never wanna have sex with my husband(who I LOVE) and we used to have a very healthy sex life before my kids....I have gained 60lbs in 4yrs..I scored a 41 on the depression test. Think I'm depressed?

Pathetic
Angel