some of us are still very afraid of strong emotions, even good ones. afraid if i get as angry as the past warrants that maybe i will morph into a monster like them. i know with my head i WON'T, but that was one of my biggest fears was turning out to be no better, no different than them. i am different than them,

i've had to devote most of my life to getting over my childhood and that makes me furious.

it also makes me BORING to some people who just wish i could get over it and never bring it up again. what ticks me off extremely is that they don't get it.