I'm just tired I guess and need a break from my world. Seems like it's never ending or it gets better for awhile. Just like a big circle. It's good for a time and then bad for a time. Someone get me off this crazy thing. Since I have to work mon-fri and I have to keep it so together during those days. And then the week-end comes and the world goes crazy on me. I stay so numb during the week, to feeling everything I've pushed aside all week in 2 days. It just gets to be too overwhelming. My husband asked me saturday if I was Ok now? Those words are not good to hear cause I know then that something had happened. He went on to tell me he found a little one hiding in the back of the closet he had convince that things were ok and they were safe. This was after him having to stop us from sucking our thumb in the middle of wal-mart. I want to be able to not worry about embarrassing myself and my husband with my behavior. It never stops. I spent most of yesterday crying. I'm not one who cries very often. I kind of know if I'm crying something is really bothering me. Right now everything is bothering me. I hurt so much yesterday. I couldn't get away from the pain. When it's both physical and mental at the same time I just can't cope. Think I'm just scared. How worse will it get? Will I get better? So much unknown right now. I want answers that no one can give me. Just sad today.