sweetie, i would heavily encourage you to call up a DV hotline and ask them to help you out in this situation. because they deal with scary partners so commonly, they will have great ideas that you can implement straight away, and then also long term solutions.

you have taken some very good steps - getting slide locks, considering mace. they will be able to suggest further things that we may not consider (e.g., packing an emergency bag with passport, id, money, clothes, legal documents etc and maybe keeping this at a friend/relative's place). they will help you take little, manageable steps, and then maybe (when you are comfortable) bigger steps to protect you and your daughter.

i am glad you are taking this seriously. it does sound like it's a threat you should consider seriously - other ppl have noticed this behaviour, i do not think for a second that you are over reacting. stop forgiving him and trying to give him room. your daughter comes first. you shouldn't tolerate any ambivalence in that scenario, yeah?

also - thank you for being brave and sharing this scary situation with us. we want to help .