I really do understand this. We lived with my parents for a few months when we moved back into the area and I cleaned the house from top to bottom on Fridays. I stripped and waxed floors, furniture was moved and the carpets were steam cleaned, every knick knack came off of the shelf and was cleaned and replaced. I even put stuff in the wrong spot on purpose so she'd know it had been done. And yet every Saturday morning I'd get up and she'd be redoing it. At the time I was so insulted. I also did all of the cooking, no matter what there wasn't a single meal that I prepared that my father didn't have a comment about how it could be made better. This continued even when they'd come to my home for visits. I had my fill when I served him some stew and he said "oh, it's very good, but the veggies are cut too big, I have to cut them to fit a bit of each into each bite." I told him don't eat it then. He really had no idea that he'd been doing it. I pointed out that day that his eggs for breakfast needed more salt, that the lettuce on his sandwich for lunch was in the wrong place, and the veggies in the stew where cut too big.

Years later my mom asked me to do her spring cleaning. My brother and his wife were coming for their five year visit and she wasn't able to get off work for the cleaning and the visit. I took that opportunity to say "no way, suddenly my work is good enough for you because you can't do it yourself." It turns out that the cleaning is part of her schedule, something she just has to do.

So here are a couple of things that I've learned being the parent of adult children and being the adult child myself. 1) No matter what, mom and dad's way of doing things. You can talk until you're blue in the face but rarely will you convice them your way of doing things is better. 2) If your parents are partially/completely responsible for your standard of living they will have an opinion on a great many things and they deserve to be heard. I believe it is my responsibility to support my daughter while she's in college. In my opinion her job now is doing well in school. She managed her money so well her first year on her own that instead of giving her money in installments her second year we gave her the entire amount the beginning of the school year. It was all gone by Christmas and she had not done her Christmas shopping yet. I am aware that she's learned her lesson but you'd better believe that I will not do that again. She will get her money monthly so that she won't be able to make that mistake again.

I doubt very much that they want to control your life, it is very draining fretting about what we see as mistakes you are making in your life. So as I said before you have the choice to let this irritate you or take a look at where you'd be in life without their help and be thankful that they care enough to help you out.