There is nothing wrong with you, the thoughts that imply "you ought to" or "you should do this or that" are not authentic , they are old programmed tapes coming from someone who had an influence/expectation in your life that perhaps used guilt to motivate you.

When you are in the right mood you will do all the things you think you should do. You can chose to do those things any way you want to do them as well. Be happy with yourself of where you are at today. your going through alot of changes and its sressful.