My next appt was tomorrow, but I canceled because of a YMCA meeting tomorrow... maybe that was a bad idea, but it's too late now... If only she could come see me at home.. I can't get to SWEDA.

I've just had Bryony starting her crap with me again. I can't take this anymore.. She said all this stuff about how I really upset her the other day for saying that our Foster Dad would hate her for who she is now, treating me like this after he said to her to take care of me and the same for me with her. She's not once looked after me.

She certainly knows how to get to me...

"Come back to me when you've got through this stage, Kirst. I'm your sister, I'm here for you when you need me, bye bye x"

No. It's not a f-cking stage, Bryony!!! Will she ever realise that??? NO! It's a part of my f-cking life! I told her that actually I'm already through that stage, that I'm moving on.

I just. I don't know. I don't need her to be giving me this s--t anymore. I can't stand it anymore. I can't take any of it anymore. I can't do it. Not anymore. All the stuff I've bottled up has just smashed on my head and it's made me crumble. I'm a mess. IOne more thing and I'll sure as hell cllapse with the sheer weight of it all.

I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry