Quote:
Originally Posted by Elysium3006
I have never had a T push to hard intentionally, and I am soooo sorry your T did this to you. That really must have been horrible for you. 
It is true that exposure to the traumatic memories and the emotions surrounding those memories can help with PTSD symptoms but this is to be done VERY carefully, and the T is always supposed to listen to the patient when they say they need to stop. If you told your T to stop, or told her you didn't want to do it anymore she should have stopped immediately and discussed how you were feeling. Instead, she kept pushing which in turn caused your mind to need to dissociate for safety.
Sometimes, when I am talking about something in T and it gets really hard, I start to dissociate too, but T knows when this happens and backs off and talks to me about my safe places and about how I'm feeling. She doesn't push. This is how T should respond to this.
I am mad for you.
I think it would be a good idea for you to call your T and tell her that you are very upset and scared and angry too because you were triggered badly in your session and she didn't listen to you which sent you into a dissociative state. Let her know that you are now scared to continue, that you feel the safety has been violated and you feel like you need a longer break. Give her an opportunity to discuss this with you and make some changes and improvements in her work with you. Ultimately though, if she keeps up this behavior, or if you just don't feel safe working with her anymore, I think you should consider terminating and seeking out a new T.
Take good care, and keep us posted if you like!! 
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((((Elysium)))))
Thank you so much for responding with such empathetic and gracious advice.The pain is just too raw to speak with T now, but in the next few days i do intend to speak with her about what went on in the session. In some ways the saftey and trust I once felt has been lost and it will take some time to get that back. Right now i am trying to do things that will take my attention away from what happened, however it helped so much to just get it out in writing. I have a feeling my fear to return to see T will last quite a while. In the meantime, i am reflecting on your words Elysium
Sending hugs your way
