Jan,
Shame is a worthless emotion when it comes to battling the nicodemon. This is an addiction. You need only to get the right tools to deal with overcoming it. Listing the reasons you want to quit is a good place to start. You can refer to it when you have a craving. And remember, a craving typically lasts 3 minutes or so. Deep breathing will get you past it and calm your anxiety too.

The smoke cessation counselor I went to years ago said that the best way to quit is to change behaviors. I have found that true for me. What will you do with all that time you now spend smoking? Take a walk, dance to the radio, start an exercise program which helps maintain weight too! That's replacing a negative addiction with a positive addiction. And the positive one will reinforce our quit.

I look forward to your quit. I have found that the anticipation of the quit is really worse than the actual quit itself! HA! It's true!
So, just take it one day at a time; heck, one minute at a time if that's what it takes. The minutes add up. And soon, you'll be smoke free.

Keep the quit and post before you puff!

Peace!