(((((((((((leacon)))))))))))))

You are not pathetic, you are depressed. You are a kind, caring person, and because of that it's understandable to be upset by and worried about the post you read. We're all grateful for your presence at this forum. I'm sorry but I can't remember whether you've mentioned having a T or not, but if you do, maybe it would be worth talking to them about this? Take care of you, you deserve to be happy and to do whatever it takes to get out of this slump.