Quote:
Originally Posted by shezbut
Just yesterday I noticed that I have a destructive pattern, which only contributes to my misery. I am not good at establishing and maintaining appropriate boundaries. The result is a man becoming to close way too fast and I freak out. For years, I have ignored that alarm, not trusting my instincts. The result is dissociation. While I may want male and female friends, my divulging too much info of myself to a small percentage of people, is a big mistake. It only attracts a man who simply wants a piece of arse.  I know that I don't want anything sexual, cause just the thought freaks me out! But, perhaps that's the only way I've ever known to develop a relationship?? It's sad to realize that I'm responsible for my own misery. |
This is very good that you realized this. Very good work! This is how I got better by realizing what was really going on with me. You might have patterns that are not helpful now but you are not responsible for your misery! I don't know what happened to you, but you were a child and a caretaker was supposed to be responsible for you so that you could grow up with good experiences and knowledge about life. Whatever you didn't learn while growing up can be learned now as an adult. This is what I did. You have taken the first step here by being aware of what isn't working and what needs some work. Very good!
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........
I'm an ISFJ
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