Just when i thought my one friend in crisis was overload.......last night, my Gfriend called crying.......AND a cutter friend IM'd in crisis as well.....so now i'm trying to carry three people on my very tired back.....and it came right when i was "taking a break" J. called yest...."THIS is THE call" he said......jesus....i'm at my mom's.....it's simply too much to bear. But as if i can turn my back to ANY one of them. So, S. is trigging my cutting.....J. is trigging my depression, and C. is calling 5 times a day.....i'm freaking out.
It's almost 6am.....it's been over 24 hrs. since sleep.......i'm exausted, broken, and very weak.....i couldn't be in a more fragile state if i tried.......
NO ONE is cutting me a break either......my time is used up.......i feel so down, so hopeless......i'm sure these guys will bleed me dry in a matter of days......where do i find SOM#E form of solace???!!! Nowhere.
Fate is making damn sure i break with maximum damage.
I'm lost, tired, and giving up. Sorry.....i just won't hold up to this kind of pressure long. Seems i was right.....some things are unavoidable aren't they?
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Some days....you bleed just to know your alive.