I feel like a failure sometimes. I have had severe bouts of depression for years (due to my low self esteem & abuses )
I have been In a relationship that I know is unhealthy...When things were going well,I was great. Now that they are not , I'm a mess. I know in my heart I am better off without this manipulative man that takes my weaknesses and uses it against me and messes with my mind. But even thow I know it's what I should do for my sake and my peace of mind....It makes me soooo depressed. I took xanax last night just to knock me out so I wouldn't think about him. Tonight I couldn't take a pill cuz I have to work in the morning. and it makes me real groggy. But I can't sleep, he keeps creeping up in my head and he wont go away. it's 3 oclock in the morning right now and i have to get up at 6 !!!
How can I get these thoughts out of my head,the sad lonely feeling, the hoplessness , the desperation, and the what if's ?
I've decided not to call him or talk to him because I know it's not good for me. I figured he would reach out to me. But it's been over 2 weeks and not even a text to see if i'm ok.
HE knows i have depression and anxiety problems. Does he think this makes it any better for me ?
I just hate the low feeling i get, and then the angry feeling, and then the restless feeling. No man should be worth going threw all this. I know this, but it's making me crazy,and affecting my health. I just don't know what to do to get these negative feelings out of my head. Does anyone have any advice ?

Thanks