i feel for you, i am also in a relationship like that,(he is in prison at the moment) i have the same symptoms, except not everyday while he is gone. i have tried to break it off many times and always return to him?????i think i love him,as i have tried to move past him and cannot.i dont know what to say, to help. love is blind? or that beauty is in the eyes of the looker? or we are so insecure, we need this kind of love? the more i try to figure things out ,the more confused i seem to get. i say men are not worth all of it also. so why do i keep wanting to go back to him? i just dont know any answers, and i do know we are all differant and all relationships are differant. all our needs are differant. i hope only the best for you, and me too.