You shouldn't feel guilty at all, you need to be free for a while. But it's your choice and I don't want to force you.

Just try and stay calm, when your bf is being a ****, just think of how much better you are then he is. And please try and stop doing everything for him, let him do stuff for himself.

Just love your son, he'll grow up to know that YOU are the one that took care of him and loved him. He'll be so grateful for that.