leacon - by emotional abuse... no she doesn't mean to do it she does it primarily to stay in control of the household. It's a mix of a lot of things, including guilt trips everywhere, making me feel like I'm a horrible person if I inconvenience her in any way. She has control over the transportation, and if she feels I'm taking too much of her control or ability to randomly leave the house if she wants to she will not allow me to go anywhere. So the house is like a cage. I used to cope by not feeling... but I can't do that anymore.

tara - it's good to know that the progress won't be lost. I feel like it will to some level but I need to hold onto what there is.

(((((((((((((((justfloating)))))))))))))))))))

thank you everyone for caring.
going home tomorrow... wish me luck