Oh boy. I did a search on Facebook for people who went to the same university as I did. I went through the list and OMG.

There was the name of the guy that almost raped me. I could barely breathe, I thought I was going to throw up. The memories are constantly going through my head. I am terrified all the time, even though I know the *** lives in Virginia, and I live in Washington. The idea that I lived within 100 miles of the *** for over 10 years freaks me out. I don't even think I am afraid of him in the here and now, but it's the past that seems like yesterday coming at me.

Nothing really happened. A friend of mine showed up and realized I was in deep trouble, and got me out of there. NOTHING HAPPENED TO ME. I probably was leading him on, but I didn't mean to. I was so careful to tell him I didn't want that sort of a relationship. I always paid my own way, didn't get physically involved...How can I be so weak?

I have no right to feel scared.
I have no right to have PTSD.

Then why do I feel this way?