Sorry to hear about everything that is going on with you. It sounds like a really horrible situation to be in.

Finding someone to talk to and maybe even stay with for a night or two might be helpful. Finding a person that you feel safe with might really make a difference.

I know from experience that the panic attacks are so frightening and given the situation they must feel so powerful.

I don't know if you have ever done this but sometimes talking back to the panic helps. I pretend that they have a voice and I ask them why they are there and what they need to say. If it is all about the fact that I am worthless, I try to yell back at them and tell them I am trying to do the best I can.

Is there anything that helps you feel good about yourself? Working out? Writing? Something that allows you to feel safe and something you enjoy. If so maybe taking some time right now to do those things might help.