That is great that you are taking it one step at a time. I had some pretty bad experiences with T's who did not understand and/or wanted me locked up. It was really scary but I knew that it was more important for me to work with someone than let it go.

I'm happy that you are talking to a p-doc and taking it from there. This stuff can be hard but and at times you might want to quit, but it's par for the course. I hope that you are able to find a therapist that you feel comfortable with and provides you with a positive atmosphere to grow and take a look at yourself in.

I am not an open person, I was not raised that way nor do I feel comfortable. It has taken me a long time and often times I still revert into what is safe. The SI is serving a purpose for you and in time you may learn new ways of handling things. It takes time, so be gentle with yourself and give yourself HUGE credit for taking the step you have.

Keep us informed.