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Even though after many years of happy marriage my husband turned into a selfish pig, i still mourn the loss of our relationship and our dreams. We were married for nearly 20 years and have a beautiful daughter who is 19. When we married i felt he was my soul mate and that we would be together forever. Unfortunately many years ago i was diagnosed with a degenerative condition and then at 35 had a nervous breakdown due to bullying bringing back bad childhood memories and as a consequence all the problems that i had been suppressing most of my life. Although my ex recognised all my problems and said he understood, he did not accept them, he became very selfish and was only interested in himself and his 'me' time. Went away at times leaving me unable to even feed myself so he could go 'play' in the mountains with his friends.
We had planned such a perfect life, but its an imperfect world at times, we are all imperfect and things dont always go the way we would like. In November this year we will have been separated for two years and i will start divorce proceedings. He is already living with his 3rd girlfriend since we split! I may mourn for what we lost but i scorn the man he became, he hasnt bothered even to see his daughter since we split, she told me to leave him several times before i did and i guess he is punishing her for that.
I am happy now though, i may be ill both physically and mentally but he wasnt going to ruin my life too! I am engaged to a very special man who has accepted everything completely from the start and is there for me however i feel and whatever i need.
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**Shadowsilence** All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream....change is eternal, perpetual and immortal.
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