I just want to hole up and hide.....I cant take it anymore. Most of my friends are gone. They are getting sick of me. half of me says the important friends are still here. The other half says dont bother trying.

I feel like ive wasted time. Like I cant get out of this house aside from work. the moment im home from work, i want to hide.

I cant keep worrying my mom. Shes worried FOR me. But I feel like I will never be what others consider normal.

I am not myself. I used to laugh and joke around, i used to sing (terribly) at parties. Im not me.....

Im just not me anymore....at least not the way I want.

C