Quote:
Originally Posted by Husband
During sex this afternoon I admitted to my wife that I had fantasized about her having sex with another man.
She was immediately, and obviously repulsed, locked herself in the bathroom. Now says she doesn't think she knows me. She feels uncherished and used. She keeps saying I want to pass her around to my friends like a *****.
Its only been 10 hours, but its not a normal fight.
Her reaction. No trying to understand, no love. No "That grosses me out why would you think that?" Just hate and repugnance.
Is my marriage doomed?
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No, your marriage isn't doomed. At least, I wouldn't expect something as simple as a fantasy to get in the way of your marriage.
I'll be as honest as I possibly can here and you should do the same with your wife, as i'm sure you do always anyway.
Be up front with her and explain the simple things that get forgotten in time. The two of you are best friends. More than that, you're lovers. Even more than that - You are life partners.
Who better to talk to than this person? Explain to her you had a fantasy, and thats all it was and ever will be. You just wanted to share your thoughts with your best friend, lover and life partner.
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Maybe to ease your mind - that's not an uncommon fantasy. I actually told my fiancee the same thing (months ago). She just kind of laughed at the thought... knowing that it was a mere fantasy. She and I are very open when it comes to sex. Not open enough to invite a third party - and potentially cause a problem in the relationship - but open enough to discuss our thoughts regarding the matter.
Basically, explain to her that that type of thing can not and never would be shared with anybody else. You needed to tell someone. She's the best avenue as that's what a marriage is about. Open, honest communication without which, any marriage would be doomed.